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Echoes and Mirrors» Blog Archive » "Dude, all we are is dust in the wind."

"Dude, all we are is dust in the wind."

Socrates is largely revered as an historical figure –in the eyes of the social sciences, especially those pertaining to critical thinking, both his life and the lessons he taught during it are greatly admired and studied. This is a man who has been dead for roughly 2400 years and never published any of his analysis or studies. His legacy was put into the history books by his (equally famous) predecessors, and students, Plato and Aristotle. Another figure whose life resembles this is me*, in 2400 years.

I will be forced to destroy my collected works in a drunken rage and my friends will attempt to piece together my teachings, which will only exist as spoken word, to assemble my cohesive universal philosophy. Socrates’ followers might have altered a few things and inserted a few of their own ideas – it is hard to say. Although they might have done their best not to change or intermingle their line of reasoning or words with my his, there remains a slight bit of confusion for philosophers and historians. My words, however, will be less often directly quoted. Most of my lessons will be told in either allegory or in relation to the stories of my disciples. Unlike Socrates, I will not be kidnapped and brought to the future from my teaching to assist with a history presentation at San Dimas High***, (which really only took place in the film Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure – a testament to his fame****). I will have a more historically accurate film made after me where they speak my ancient tongue and subtitle everything.

Much like Socrates, I will be persecuted for bucking the status quo; there will be both religious and political charges brought against me. While he was charged with corrupting the youth and impiety, I will be charged with attempting to incite riots and gathering people under misunderstood religious tenants that will later become one of the most powerful on Earth. Socrates was put to death quietly, quickly and mercifully; I will be put to death slowly and tortured throughout.

If my name were Jesus of Nazareth and I lived two thousand years ago.****

* And by me, I mean me. I am so very tempted to turn this very paper in, instead of something reasonable and serious. This version has all the pertinent facts for comparison with all the added bonus of being hilarious and ego-soothingly self-referential!

** This part might stay for the real paper, although I might actually have to explain the reference to Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. Sad times when you have to explain something like that. Whoa!

*** If Jesus were a real Historical Figure, why wasn’t he brought to the future?

**** The Power of Snark?

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