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Echoes and Mirrors» Blog Archive » Fuck You, Science. Stop ruining my dreams.

Fuck You, Science. Stop ruining my dreams.

Stephen Hawking has been stirring up the pot a bit lately. And none of it amuses me. Especially because I can clearly see that he’s right. The associated FARK.com thread is mightily amusing, however. I am actually very surprised at how few people understand the very simply idea of relativity.

First, his ‘aliens are dangerous’ notion is most likely played out through the law of unintended consequences. Nobody would intend for alien contact to destroy us, but it probably would. According to him. I don’t know and I most likely never will. I’ll keep to my sci-fi, thank you.

Even realistically looking at it, even if we encounter extraterrestrial sentient life, there is little chance they are humanoid. It would be like encountering sentient space dolphins. We would see that they have built stuff, travel through space, communicate with each other, etc. and they (hopefully) see the same with us. And then we just stare at each other in confusion.

Not to mention the incredibly large distances that most likely exist between us and any other life out there.  If they’re more than 100 light years away, they haven’t picked up any radio transmissions from us. And the further away they are, the longer it will be before they do. If they do. If they’re more than 10,000 light years away, there is every chance that by time they even identify our planet as being habitable (assuming they have the same standards for habitability) we could be gone. Or the opposite will happen – we discover their planet, but really, they’re all dead by time we see them.

Worse yet, our civilization could be the first to exist. It surely wouldn’t be the last, but it could be that we are the first. Which means we have to be the older brother in any futuristic situation. It also means we could bring death and destruction to younger alien species. But, considering life did spring up on this planet far, far before us, I don’t find that likely.

Next is this time travel crap. The Science channel has done at least three new shows on it in the last month. And Hawking himself talked about it on his Discovery Channel show. Well, it boiled down to this:

  • Future Travel: very much a possibility, requiring near-light-speed propulsion and astronomical distances.
  • Backward Travel: not happening. The only possibilities explored required phenomenon we don’t even have evidence for existing.
  • Won’t be compact or convenient.

All of which bores me. Travelling to the future is great, but only if you can come back. Travelling backward in time is pretty much a lost cause.

And that any of it requires something like near-light-speed propulsion, black and white holes (no evidence for a white hole, although they should exist), linked black-holes, or the intersection of cosmic strings. Or other crazy things we don’t know about or haven’t seen. None of which makes the concept even remotely convenient. Or fun.

It makes philosophical paradoxes a moot point. No fun, again. If you really want to explore the possibilities of time travel paradoxes, watch Primer. It’s probably the best time travel movie I’ve ever seen.

Which makes me hate science. Not that I don’t admit they’re probably right, just that by taking some of the mystery out of the universe, they remove the possibility that I could do fantastic things such as time travel, visit parallel universes, or meet exotic and sexy green alien women with the compatible genitalia.

So until I start seeing somebody come up with theories that promote the existence of faster-than-light travel without being so retardedly difficult that it’s not worth the trouble (and that is the minimum requirement here, the rest is negotiable) I will continue to hate you, Science. Stop dashing my hopes and dreams and start making this cold-and-uncaring universe more accessible to me.

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