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Echoes and Mirrors » sex

Archive for the ‘sex’ Category

Most Zen Video Ever Cut

Tuesday, August 17th, 2010

TOBACCO – Super Gum from TOBACCO on Vimeo.

It’s kinda zen like that. There is no denying that what is in this video exists. It’s not really horrifying, or pleasing. It’s more like a benign tumor. Yes, yes it is a tumor. This time.

If I ever make a movie, I want it to be something like this but with more explosions and keyboard cat.

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Wikipedia Porn

Monday, August 16th, 2010

Wikipedia goes into great detail to explain what a creampie is.

I just think it’s amusing. Actually, the rather dry way they describe any of the linked pornographic acts all lack the erotic lining you might expect from amateur encyclopedia editors (the one exception being that the artist chose to render an anal creampie as opposed to the more traditional vaginal creampie, a risqué move by Wikipedia if I say so myself). But, what it lacks in stimulation it makes up for in history lessons. Which are also quite disappointing. Actually, come to think of it, the only thing that’s even interesting are the zany vector art renditions of pornographic acts. I’m not going to post any of those, but they do share one thing in common with most pornography I’ve seen: the people actors models whores in them have cold, dead eyes and aren’t smiling. (Just kidding, whores are people too.)

I would be smiling. It’s another reason I’m better than a lot of people – I’m just positive and upbeat like that. My only question about it is this: when you’re in a room with nine other naked men and a cameraman, is there exemption from calling “no homo” or is it implied by professional standards? I’ll just let you think about that one for a minute and get back to me.

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The “Cougar Cruise” fails to satisfy, and this actually surprised someone

Monday, June 7th, 2010

What really happens aboard a ‘cougar cruise’? – USATODAY.com.

Plain-spoken Jersey guy Chris Alberts, 31, just out of a four-year relationship, is “here to hook up. Period. And I don’t want to hear any of this, ‘I’ve never done this before’ B.S., either.”

That’s beautiful. And If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard it, I could go get myself a pack of smokes.

By Day 6, one contingent of cougars has declared the bulk of the cub set “lacking in maturity.” At dinner that night Jersey guy Alberts declares, “This little cougar thing is B.S. (It was) 25 guys hitting on (a few) women.”

“Especially when (the cubs) are drunk,” counters Hughes, rolling her eyes.

“But it was definitely a good time,” Alberts adds.

“Yeah,” Hughes says, a tad wistfully. “I had a blast.”

Others apparently did, too. In a post-cruise e-mail, one attendee writes of bumping into a cub on the way home, “who filled me in on some gossip. OMG!!!! There were some wild women on the trip, and as I suspected, the guys were comparing notes.”

So what is the net effect of purposely sticking younger guys on a cruise with older women? Nothing. A few of the women really went wild and the guys who would probably have gotten laid anyway got laid. And those who wouldn’t have, didn’t. I still suspect the entire cruise is stacked in the guys’ favor, but only for those who wouldn’t have much problems anyway (even if they don’t apply themselves very often).

In case you’ve somehow escaped this overused sobriquet, “cougar” refers to a woman who prefers younger men. (The male equivalent would be called a “man.”)

I stick with “cougars” being “hot, older women” specifically. Otherwise they’re just old broads. Which is probably why there were issues with the participants of this “cougar cruise” that lacked real “cougars” and had too many “old broads.”

They didn’t attempt to fix the ratio of men to women (which turned out to be more men than women). And apparently, there weren’t enough “Demis” or “Ashtons” aboard either. So, natural forces took over and some people still failed. So the normal ratios of fatties and uglies were probably there.

I’m not even sure how one could stack the odds or manipulate the groupings to ensure 100% matching. Some people are simply not meant to procreate without the assistance of money. Either by being rich and having high dating-market value, or by direct payment for services rendered.

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Q: Is turnabout fairplay? A: Wrong question.

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

Roissy, among many others, describes an alpha-beta split in human men. His examples and evidence is compelling, especially for anyone who leans towards evolutionary psychology.

Well, here is even more proof:

I know I’ve been writing a lot about reproductive rights and sexual health issues, but the stories I want to comment on seem to be increasing lately. As someone who writes a lot about these issues, I’ve noticed something interesting over the years about the feedback I get on the “moral” question of abortion, specifically from self-identified pro-choicers.

Wait for it…

95-99% of this feedback is from men.

Wanting to be a father, in my mind, was about wanting to make the decision jointly with a woman and moving forward with a plan. But in real life, there are often situations where decisions are made passively, because of an unintended pregnancy. And I realized how that might actually be something men who want marriage and fatherhood hope for. Why not? In our sexist society, the decision to marry is basically on the man. Women are the ones who are supposed to be eager to get married, but they’re also the ones who are supposed to sit back and wait to be asked. But asking is showing eagerness, but eagerness is supposed to be girly stuff, so I imagine that’s intimidating for a lot of dudes. Ways to manage the slight emasculation inherent in picking out jewelry and showing interest in this wedding stuff include having a huge public proposal where people will side with you and her only role is to say “yes”, asking her father first and making it seem transactional, or getting over your hang-ups about masculinity and just asking. Or….you could get her pregnant and be the conquering hero by making an honest woman of her. As soon as I realized this, I realized what a powerful fantasy that must be to some men. It’s the perfect way to get what you want (marriage, babies) without having to say you want that girly stuff.

It’s simply a reversal. Instead of the lower value woman attempting to trap a man with a baby, the lower value man attempts to use it on his prized trophy woman.

It’s the perfect way to get what you want (marriage, babies) without having to say you want that girly stuff.

I fear that’s the logic, but not the truth. The reason might be the way pop-culture and feminism have twisted the idea of masculinity.

I can’t imagine how this would actually work in today’s post-feminist, women’s liberated (huh?) world. If you get her pregnant, she can do just fine without a hubby. Hell, she can have the child, keep her job, take the guy’s money, and still remain unmarried (and not have to worry about sleeping with whomever she pleases).

Maybe one day I’ll share some of my own personal anecdotes wherein I’ve witnessed things like this, and worse.

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I smell fear

Saturday, January 23rd, 2010

It may be possible to smell fear on another person:

“The chemical transfer of anxiety may cause a feeling of discomfort in the perceiver. It’s like a sixth sense,” says psychologist Bettina Pause of the University of Düsseldorf in Germany, one of the authors of the paper.

Here is the paper at PLoS ONE.

I’ve mentioned before how posture can affect your confidence, but could your body chemestry betray your anxiety anyway? Only if you let it. If you’ve worked on your self-affirmation enough, and are harnessing the power of the feedback loop of confidence from good posture, then it shouldn’t.

Also, it’s an unconscious perception, this smell of fear. It can be overruled and flanked. Of course, by doing so, you might remove the “anxiety sweat” from the equation altogether. Deodorant might also work.

Confidence is key to life, whether you mean to dominate a board meeting or are trying to beat Wilt Chamberlain. You are awesome, but not as awesome as me.

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Attractiveness as a semi-objective notion

Wednesday, January 20th, 2010

A smattering of articles on attractiveness, desire (as a cognitive function) and what it all means sort of sprung up on me today, with wonderful serendipity. The science of sex is complex, but from my observations thus far in life, the assertion that beauty is not limited to the physical is bullshit.

This comes the fact that pictures of ugly girls stirs nothing in my loins. Initial attraction by sight is a built-in cognitive function that society has cleverly tried to deprogram from men in it’s collective egalitarianism (which is necessary for survival and peace, more than likely). And this doesn’t mean personality is worthless – but it is certainly a second tier of attractiveness rating (a good personality can move a girl up a bit, maybe half a point). Men like skinny, seductive girls, biologically.

But attractiveness cannot be solely objective… otherwise there would be no wiggle room. For instance, I don’t like women that are taller than me, prefer brunettes to blondes and don’t care for Asian girls particularly (I’ve been with all three of those – not at the same time, though).

So now, some scientists have isolated the area of the brain that reacts to attractiveness and identifies desire. Lo and behold, there are differences in what we find attractive. This doesn’t supercede the previous, it supplements it.

In addition, the previous claims that looking younger generally correlates to looking more beautiful (an objective look at beauty) has a bit of a twist: it might mean looking less masculine.

Conclusion: the brain allows for unique preferences (which might be biologically driven or socially driven) but the brain tends to set standards from a biologically hardcoded baseline. This is where Freud might come into explain perversions and deviant preferences. The conscious is strong and can do some very unpleasant things – so obese women might be attractive to someone, but only because of some deviance or perversion.

Which reminds me, everyone should see FEED. You’ll need a strong stomach, though.

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All to stop syphilis

Sunday, October 18th, 2009

My experience with a prostitute – a feminist perspective

I was on vacation in Atlantic City – a two-week break from my year-long deployment in Iraq. At about 3 a.m., I ran into and eventually had drinks with a woman who I eventually brought up to my room, thinking this was going to be a mere casual hook-up, things that people do on vacation and in bars. Come to find out, before I initiated sex, and we were flirting, she told me that she is an escort and spends time with men for money. In short, it was the beginning of a business for pleasure transaction.

Though my mind was fogged with alcohol, red flags went up – firstly because I’d felt horrible that I’d taken an hour of this woman’s time already, just talking to her, with the full intentions of having sex had she not been a sex worker. Secondly, I had never been in a situation like this before, and didn’t know exactly what to do to tell her I had to intentions of buying her body for my own pleasure.

Having already wasted an hour of her time, with her assuming I knew she was an escort (a term she says she prefers), I made a deal: while I was most certainly sexually attracted to her, my values wouldn’t allow me to actually pay to have sex with her. I would, however, pay for her time to listen to her story and learn something from a group of people I’ve spent to much learning about, yet never had never actually sat down and spoken with.

So there we sat, in my hotel room, and over Jack Daniels, talked about her life, choices and perspectives. She is new to the escort industry, she said – and became an escort after much careful consideration – mostly for the stigma that comes with sex work, but also consideration for the dangers she faced, and the way society and the government look upon her.

I don’t even know where to start, but I’ll lay a few things out to get the ball rolling:

  1. Being a war vet does not make you manly. This guy proves it.
  2. Sex workers of the sort he met do it because they choose to. Exploitation was not part of the equation.
  3. His vagina still had sand in it from his deployment.
  4. Prostitution is amoral. Get off your fucking high horse.

There is nothing wrong with respecting a whore for her work -she puts in the time and effort to produce a satisfactory product. There is also nothing wrong with acknowledging a whore as a person because they are people. Big whoop. There is something wrong with patronizing them and being condescending.

If he doesn’t find hiring a prostitute kosher, he should have just said, “oh, well, not interested,” and went back out to find a normal girl. Instead, he sat with her, blue balls crammed up in his pantyhose, and talked.

Of course, if you really believe it is immoral and should be outlawed and that women who choose to go into the profession are secretly coerced, then you probably respect the guy. I think he’s lacking in testosterone.

(Anti-prostitution laws were passed as health-care measures, at least superficially. The real reason was ugly women who wanted to put an embargo on imports. If you get my drift. And my drift means intercourse. For money. Penis. Vagina. Cash.)

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The forest through the trees?

Saturday, October 17th, 2009


Weed Culture is Boob Culture:

Why aren’t there more female marijuana activists, Marijuana Policy Project employee Laura Greenback asks in High Times. Ooh! Pick me! I know the answer!

It’s not that women don’t like smoking weed. We do. And it’s not that we don’t care about the ass-backwards war on drugs—despite Greenback’s fears, half of the MPP’s top staff are women. It’s not that there are too few pop-culture stoner females, as Double X suggests—though we’re getting warmer!

All culture is boob culture. Because women like to exert control through their sex organs. And most men will bow to their wishes, hence sex sells.

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Tidbits

Friday, October 16th, 2009

I’m getting ready for a heavy-duty weekend of studying. The next several days worth of posts have been scheduled (actually, most of them are anyway as I don’t have time to do it every day of the week).

The tidbits:

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Funny, but True

Thursday, October 15th, 2009

marriedtothesea.com
marriedtothesea.com

I find that drink-slapping does much for my game.

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